Local Jackass To Experience Homelessness


May 29, 2015 - Local / Uncategorized

According to sources, local 27-year-old buffoon Evan Thompson will live among the homeless for 24 hours in order to gain a better understanding of those less fortunate.

Thompson is the son of wealthy entrepreneur S. S. Thompson, who Evan specifies “is not a boat…anymore.” Evan says he hopes the experience will make him a better person.

“The other day I was taking bong rips with my homeless friend Ruby, and I was like, ‘Oh shit, what if I was homeless?!’” he wrote in a statement on his family’s company website.

“And so I told Ruby, ‘Hey man, I got an idea that will TRIP YOU OUT,” he wrote.

Robert Blatt, a homeless veteran, says Thompson has actually done this exact same thing before already.

“I’m surprised he doesn’t remember. It was only two weeks ago. He spent the whole time talking about how excited he was to go home and take a shower,” he told¬†The Pasadenoid.

“Which does not really capture what the experience of what homelessness is like. But I’ll bet that was a real nice shower,” he added.

Thomspon tells the media he will begin his inquiry on Saturday “right after rugby practice.” He hopes coverage of his journey will bring attention to the plight of homelessness.

“I think this would would be a better place if we all could understand each other better. And I just…oh…oh god I’m gonna be sick…I’m so wasted right now.”