Lemon Just Sitting There For Hours

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September 17, 2015 - Local

According to local reports, a lemon has just been sitting on the counter, doing nothing, and has been for the last few hours.

“That there lemon ain’t moved a hairpin,” said the homeowner Richard Lewis.

“I’ve had my eye on it. Not a tremble from that there lemon,” he added.

Lewis’ wife Henrietta says she’s mystified by the circumstances as well.

“Come to think of it, and by ‘it’ I mean ‘that there lemon’, I ain’t too sure how it even got there in the first place!” she said.

Locals have reacted to the news with a mix of surprise and outrage.

“Leave me alone! I have no fucking idea what you’re talking about!”  banker Richard Samm told The Pasadenoid.

In the meantime, Lewis says he continues to watch for updates.

“Oh wait, it moved,” he said.

 

› tags: existentialism / fruit / lemons /