Job Board: October
October 4, 2016 - Local
Vice-Presidential Candidate
Pence blew it last night and I need someone who doesn’t look like he’s always sucking on a lemon. If you’re interested call Bill O’Reilly and he’ll connect you.
Organ Donor
We are a music conservatory seeking a positive donor who can help our institution. Please don’t send bloody human parts, for some reason we’ve been receiving a lot of those.
Human Catapult
Want to launch your career to new heights? We just fired our last employee and are looking for a young gunner to set our company alight! It will be…explosive. You get it.
Guy to write wanted ads
I’m getting lazy and it’s only a matter of time before I get the ol’ heave-ho.