Editorial: Maude! Maude!
August 31, 2016 - Local
by Jake Smalls, Altadena
Maude! Maude! Maaaaaude! Get down here Maude, I got something to say. Maude?
What’s that? I can’t….NO I CAN’T HEAR YOU! What? What?! Would you just come down here Maude? GOD DAMMIT MAUDE I SAID I CAN’T HEAR YOU WOULD YOU JUST COME DOWN HERE FOR ONE SEC-
…what?! Coinstar in the Durango? What the hell does that….I SAID WHAT THE HELL IS THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN?!?! I swear to God almighty you must be losing it woman. Can you even hear me? MAUDE?!
Oh there you are honey I didn’t see you there. What are you doing crouched behind the sofa? I could of sworn you were upstairs. Anyway I just wanted to ask if you knew what time Craig needed to be dropped off at soccer practice. What’s that? I know he’s upstairs that’s why I wanted you to ask him….oh never mind.